Win A Prize In A Reader's Heart

Win A Prize In A Reader’s Heart

I don’t care to ever win a grand Prize For Literature as long as I can win a prize in a reader’s heart. "A woman's, an angel's heart, ha, ha" corrects Opa Johan.

June 2012

A Revelation

A Revelation

I have cared for my teeth as best as I can, yet slowly are they deteriorating. I have lost them one by one and they cannot be renewed as milk teeth can. I’m grateful for their service of more than half a century. Should I have the few remaining to be taken out, to preserve a good look, countenance by replacing them with a set of artificial teeth? When one day I’ve lost them all, I still can have an artificial set made, like some one using a wig when he is bald.

So, what about being toothless? A man wihout eyes has no sight, yet he can still “see” with his fingers. Hawking has lost his ability to speak and to walk. But his brain is sharp, brilliant. He still lectures and writes scientific books. Why worry?

We are endowed with incomparable, invaluable abilities and what I have lost is but a minor part of what I still possess. So did I tell Pak Arif.

Yes, that’s true, he said.

Most of us are ignorant or unconscious of the magnificent capabilities, performance of our senses and body, unless we lose them. We also ought to be grateful for our eyes: to be able to know, distinguish colors, what is red, green, forms, what is round, flat, large, small.

Then what about our ears, our tongue, our nose, our touch, … ? To know sounds, what is high or low, soft or loud, sweet, sour, bitter, fragrant, and endlessly more.

Not to mention of our hands, feet, fingers, Imagine what they can do, accomplish. Jump to almost 2,30 m high and almost 9 m far, run so fast the 100 m in less than 10 sec., climb, hold, work, play music instruments, catch, dance … ; we are equipped with superb brains; then we have sex, to maintain the continuance of the race.

And there still are such things as the mind and spirit, which are within us but nobody knows where exactly they are seated.

What is bestowed on us is invaluable. What they accomplish every day is unbelievable and that for as long as one’s life time. Besides, they have a lot of the most pleasant surprises in store:

My eyes have seen, read, the most beautiful and captivating books, things, sceneries. My ears have heard, listened to the most exquisite sounds of nature and music, my tongue has tasted the most delicious foods and heavenly drinks. My nose has scented the most fragrant scents, …

My heart has felt the happiness of loving and being loved. How engaging it was when we competed, quarreled - not in out-doing, harming one another -, but on the contrary, competed in generosity, in bringing the greatest happiness, self-sacrifice to each other. So

Pak Arif said.

He became silent and then continued.

I imagined life without eyes. Darkness, what could one see? Silent. What could one hear wihout ears? Dreary, cheerless, without taste, without memory, without hands, feet, and all other withouts.

And there still were such wonderful things as birth, life and death. I can’t grasp, what kind of Artist or Creator could create a universe and so brilliant a being in it, effortless through billions of years.

Pak Arif started, clapped and cried in elation.

And so I awoke, feeling grateful for having this dream.

Epilogue

After reading this, si upik smiled and said:

We certainly should be grateful for our senses and body. Yet, what is there to see were there no light. No stars visible were there no night. It would be dead were there no soul, no stir; of revolving, rotating planets, of sailing clouds, flowing water, waving trees, of crawling, fluttering, breathing life. It would be cold were there no warmth, or dull were there no forms, no shapes, no colors, scents and fragrances. Didn’t you say it before?

What’s the use, the purpose of having eyes, ears, a nose, a tongue, a mouth, a voice, a brain, a hand, a finger, were there no sun, no earth, no paradise to live on? Ha, ha, ha, she laughed.

Certainly, I inwardly reflected. We should also be grateful for this kind of bestowal. Yes, that’s si upik’s way, she’s always teasing, she always must make me the loser.

From Suara Karya, 14 Desember 1996 Berita Buana, 24 Pebruari 1997

Pak Arif’s comment:

Suppose you never knew, never saw an eye, an ear, an arm, a brain, … , before, could you create, devise, imagine a creature, a being with brains, eyes, wings, fins, legs, arms, bones, memory, breath, ... ? Could you ever create, conceive of matter, space and time, life and death when you never knew this before?

Musing On Publishing In A Blog

Musing On Publishing In A Blog

Does it make a differenc when I publish in a blog or publish in an honorable hard cover book? No difference. The writing would remain the same.

And I thought of the life time of a book. What of the life time in a blog? I felt it was preserved for “eternity”, for anyone, universal, for young and old, man and woman, black and white, rich and poor, educated and uneducated, far and near, ... to have a share. Even when the author isn’t active anymore or dies, it would be still there, even be better preserved than in a library, except it becomes out of date.

And I thought of good writing, good music, good thoughts, good paintings, ... art, science, philosophy which never expires, never becomes out of date, always still fresh and good through time.

June 2012

Musing On Good Writing

Musing On Good Writing

Good writing; does it need the support, help of photos, videos?

Good photos, videos;  do they need the support, help of words?

June 2012

Musing On My Posts

Musing On My Posts

What were readers like one of my post more than my post what in my opinion is better, more valuable?

Should I rather believe the reader’s valuation, opinion, choice, than mine? 

June 2012

Musing On Luck

Musing On Luck

Were it by chance, accidentally, or fate, one is lucky?

“I’m lucky to be born a man, aren’t you lucky born a woman?” said a lover.

“What, were you fated to be a chicken for chicken soup?”

“I’m lucky to be born in this age and blessed with the computer, internet, digital camera.”

“What, were you sent to a war on compulsory military duty?”

“I’m lucky to have parents who provided for my education.”

“By chance or were it accidentally that I heard beautiful music of Bach, Debussy, ... and now love music?”

“By chance I read Dr. Cooper on Aerobics,  Dr. Bates on Better Eyesight and today have I still a fairly good health and still a good sight without glasses.”

“Can you choose to be born beautiful, intelligent? Born a prince, in Russia, in the past, the future, an Indonesian, to be born or not to be born, choose your gender, your parents, ...?”

“I’ve survived many dangerous times: of revolution, of unrest, of illness, I’m lucky to be still alive” said opa Johan ”and all the good, what I achieved in my life started not according to my will but only afterwards it became my will due to luck, or was it accidentally, or by chance to be acquainted with the many things I now very like, love? How lucky I am.”

June 2012

Comfort Myself On My Poor Recording

Comfort Myself On My Poor Recording

Biking along a country road for more than an hour in Bojong Gede, feasting my eyes, ears  through a paradise of rich greeneries, trees, the earth so fertile, fishponds, villages, cottages, lakes, cicadas singing, ...  and hear this bamboo flute, the gamelan playing.         

Could you avoid the noise of motor-bikes, cars passing by when you’re sound recording? Except you could record it in the studio. Besides I can capture the environment and make me a still picture for my picture’s blog. Why grumble? So I comfort myself. 

June 2012

Opa Johan Musing On Love

Opa Johan Musing On Love

How great it was when I was young and in love. I thought a marriage was the highest pitch in life.

But as I mused today, how sad were it so. What’s the use of getting married were it not possible to reach a  still higher pitch, level of happiness and bliss?

I never knew, realized that love could even grow grander, richer, mature in growing old, despite sickness, poor outward appearance, lack of money. And I thought of the happiness, joys of being a couple, a mother, a family, of sharing, of sorrow, of pain, of want, of “fidelity” and “infidelity”, the so sweetness of peace after a violent war, ...

What is a happy marriage without having to face the storms of life? A dull, stupid haven.

Sure, Opa Johan has just his simple down-to-earth thoughts, simple talk, he can never speak or write poetry in riddles.

June 2012

Opa Johan's Diary

Opa Johan’s Diary

In another big  quarrel I said to my lover: “Just leave me, you’ll be free, I don’t love you anymore, why do you bind, tie me, you don’t give me my freedom? Can’t you feel?”

And she begged, prayed, entreated and said: “I don’t care though you say a thousand times that you can’t love me and accuse, blame me that I don’t give you your freedom. How I still want to stay with you though every another time you chase me away. Why are you so cruel? Can’t you see, feel? Now kiss me, to make up for all the wrongs you did to me without reason.”

While she never read, wrote poetry, ever listened to heart-rending arias of an opera.  Subandrio has a wonderful wife who waited years for him though  his freedom from prison came just on his 80^th year, yet, is my lover not as wonderful as she is and I’m but an old scarecrow?

October 2009

June 2012

What If Prince Charming Would ...

Did it ever occur to you that one day your “Prince Charming” would look like a scare-crow, would you then marry me? Wouldn’t you regret it? It would be a shame were I to cover, hide my poor, old appearance to deceive you. And what is it worth if you just loved me, were I young, handsome, you were faithful just because you feared of what is said that “what God has united, no man ever should separate”?

Now, kiss me if you aren’t sorry of having married me, said opa Johan to his wife.

February 2010 

June 2012