A Dream In Old Age

A Dream In Old Age

I have cared for my teeth as best as I can, yet slowly are they deteriorating. I have lost them one by one and they cannot be renewed as milk teeth can. I’m grateful for their service of more than half a century. Should I have the few remaining to be taken out, to preserve a good look, countenance by replacing them with a set of artificial teeth? When one day I’ve lost them all, I still can have an artificial set made, like some one using a wig when he is bald.

So, what about being toothless? A man wihout eyes has no sight, yet he can still “see” with his fingers. Hawking has lost his ability to speak and to walk. But his brain is sharp, brilliant. He still lectures and writes scientific books. Why worry?

We are endowed with incomparable, invaluable abilities and what I have lost is but a minor part of what I still pocess. So did I tell Pak Arif.

Yes, that’s true, he said.

Most of us are ignorant or unconscious of the magnificent capabilities, performance of our senses and body, unless we lose them. We also ought to be grateful for our eyes: to be able to know, distinguish colors, what is red, green, forms, what is round, flat, large, small.

Then what about our ears, our tongue, our nose, our touch, … ? To know sounds, what is high or low, soft or loud, sweet, sour, bitter, fragrant, and endlessly more.

Not to mention of our hands, feet, fingers, Imagine what they can do, accomplish. Jump to almost 2,30 m high and almost 9 m far, run so fast the 100 m in less than 10 sec., climb, hold, work, play music instruments, catch, dance … ; we are equipped with superb brains;then we have sex, to maintain the continuance of the race.

And there still are such things as the mind and spirit, which are within us but nobody knows where exactly they are seated.

What is bestowed on us is invaluable. What they accomplish every day is unbelievable and that for as long as one’s life time. Besides, they have a lot of the most pleasant surprises in store:

My eyes have seen, read, the most beautiful and captivating books, things, sceneries. My ears have heard, listened to the most exquisite sounds of nature and music, my tongue has tasted the most delicious foods and heavenly drinks. My nose has scented the most fragrant scents, …

My heart has felt the happiness of loving and being loved. How engaging it was when we competed, quarreled - not in out-doing, harming one another -, but on the contrary, competed in generosity, in bringing the greatest happiness, self-sacrifice to each other. So Pak Arif said.

He became silent and then continued.

I imagined life without eyes. Darkness, what could one see? Silent. What could one hear wihout ears? Dreary, cheerless, without taste, without memory, without hands, feet, and all other withouts.

And there still were such wonderful things as birth, life and death. I can’t grasp, what kind of Artist or Creator could create a universe and so brilliant a being in it, effortless through billions of years.

Pak Arif started, clapped and cried in elation.

And so I awoke, feeling grateful for having this dream.


Epilogue
After reading this, si upik smiled and said:

We certainly should be grateful for our senses and body. Yet, what is there to see were there no light. No stars visible were there no night. It would be dead were there no soul, no stir; of revolving, rotating planets, of sailing clouds, flowing water, waving trees, of crawling, fluttering, breathing life. It would be cold were there no warmth, or dull were there no forms, no shapes, no colors, scents and fragrances. Didn’t you say it before? What’s the use, the purpose of having eyes, ears, a nose, a tongue, a mouth, a voice, a brain, a hand, a finger, were there no sun, no earth, no paradise to live on? Ha, ha, ha, she laughed.

Certainly, I inwardly reflected. We should also be grateful for this kind of bestowal. Yes, that’s si upik’s way, she’s always teasing, she always must make me the loser.

From Suara Karya, 14 Desember 1996Berita Buana, 24 Pebruari 1997


Pak Arif’s comment:
Suppose you never knew, never saw an eye, an ear, an arm, a brain, … , before, could you create, devise, imagine a creature, a being with brains, eyes, wings, fins, legs, arms, bones, memory, breath, ... ? Could you ever create, conceive of matter, space and time, life and death when you never knew this before?