You May Kiss Opa When 17 Years Old

You May Kiss Opa When 17 Years Old

So said Opa Johan to his grandchild, “but now you won’t, except you could steal a kiss.” And she “vowed” to do so, witnessed by all the family members. Can you imagine her eager to steal a kiss. He’s sitting in front in the car and she, from behind, waiting patiently for a chance by luring him into oblivion suddenly attacks. When she doesn’t succeed, she tried to force a kiss by tying him up with her hands and he said: “foul, it doesn’t count.” When she succeeded she triumphantly proclaimed her victory “One – Zero, Two … - Zero”.

But as she grew up into a beautiful girl she felt a bit awkward.

“Then I’ll free her of her promise on her 17th year as her birthday present and tell her that it was just to tease her, a playful deal between a little girl and an adult. Every time she, a little girl, so anxious to kiss an old scarecrow like me that was a lot more than when it were offered, given freely. But this was done, taken by force despite my prohibition. I was so grateful, I didn’t tell her, no one. How great that was can you imagine. Ha, ha, ha.” he said to me.

And I mused to never promise, vow if you can’t keep your vow; promise to love, be faithful forever if later you’d be sorry, repent to be bound, tied by it as I remember Si Bhuta, our pigeon, so free, still giring, (passionate in love running after its mate), faithful without vows or severe oaths even in old age, though she’s crippled, old, “ugly” and can’t fly, and I felt ashamed.

July 2008

How To Steal A Kiss

Opa Johan’s granddaughter wrote a letter how she succeeded, managed to steal a kiss of granddad without having to wait 10 years more. Her letter was in Indonesian.

To Opa:

How kiss opa? Like this: talk about songs or music and wait, patient. And we must sit beside or behind (in the car). That’s the way. Want to kiss you must sit.

So my story, one day I, oma, opa papi, mami and etc. in the car. We talked songs, then he’s hit. Every time I always hit a kiss opa. (without first having to wait till 17 years old)

From Angela

March 2004

Not What's Much, A Lot Is Good, But ...

Not What’s Much, A Lot Is Good, But …

As a child I was taught, advised to read, to learn a lot for my own good. So said Pak Arif to me.

What’s reading a lot? News, information, books? Almost wasting your time, burden yourself with a lot of worthless knowing. Reading a lot of novels? Why hurry and almost not enjoy it? Seeing TV, hearing a lot CD’s, I’ll get sated.

Learn a lot?. I’ve learned driving a car, but I have forgotten how to drive now. I’ve forgotten of what I’ve learned before: Mandarin, French, Biology, Civics, Grammar, … And I think of the foolish praise of general knowledge, perhaps for the sake to be esteemed, regarded as an intellectual, educated, sophisticated citizen. What does it profit me of just knowing Bach but haven’t heard a piece and enjoyed it? What’s knowing Picasso, Hemingway, Darwin, Newton, It’s even better to forget them but remember, enjoy his music, his paintings, his novels, value their thoughts.

There’s the captivating “Not Smarter Than A Fifth Grader” Starworld program on TV showing that we’re not smarter than a fifth grader.

I remember a Dutch saying, - who was it who said this beautiful thought? - Niet het vele is goed maar het goede is veel. Not what is much, a lot is good, valuable but what is good that’s worth much, worth a lot and invaluable.

I would learn to read less, but good, interesting topics, slow down, read it twice, … understand, enjoy it. When I want to know something, I can look it up in a dictionary, encyclopedia or search via Google.

Why waste, burden my life with reading, learning, hearing, seeing a lot with what I don’t like.

I never learned to remember the heroes, the kingdoms in the Mahabharata, But I still remember them and their stories after half a century. The Choir Conductor performs the pieces he loves with his choir and so remembers, even enjoys them better than on CD or VCD. Suppose subjects were taught like reading War And Peace, history, would then come to live, we would love the subject. rather than hate them as dead, stale, dreary, burdensome to be learned by heart. The Sea around Us, The Insect World Of Jean Henri Farbre would become unforgettable oceanography, entomology. And I imagine children in the future studying by internet showing Wild Life and other subjects live as on TV.

As I think of your Home Page, why should you hurry and turn out a lot of low quality writings. Certainly, you would like to dress it pleasing to the eye but that would take you a lot of time to learn the tailor’s trade and it doesn’t make your writings any the better. Good quality would always remain the same despite a poor appearance.

So Pak Arif advised me.

July 2008

The Choir Conductor's Written Address

The Choir Conductor’s Written Address

Is it possible that we (his choir of old age members) are not great (hebat), very great?
Is it possible that all of you are not great, very great?
Is it possible that His creation is not great, very great?
If The Creator of all these creations were not super-super great?

To you who are aged, you certainly could improve yourself and even may surpass us.
To you who are young, don’t take us as example but perform your concert as twice as great as is ours now.

That was his written address in the Bahasa to the audience in a church in Jakarta.

Sure, I think, but most of us don’t believe or don’t know, how splendid, magnificent we are equipped, of what we can achieve which is almost unbelievable. That’s why we often don’t attain, reach what we’re capable of. And I remember Opa Johan who still was able to bicycle some 50 Km in old age.

July 2008

A Thought On Paradise

A Thought On Paradise

I was practicing an oriental health exercise by walking barefooted on “planted” stones in Monas Park. As I lay down on the stones on my back to have my back also “massaged” on the stones, I got a new, wonderful view of the trees with their branches, leaves as something of a beautiful silhouette painting, embroidery against the clear sky. I never observed in that way before and I thought that it would be wonderful to have my bed in the garden and view the trees, the stars, the moon and clouds. As I turned and lay down on my side, I saw the people exercising, walking without feet as though gliding on air. How wonderful. Viewing the world in this way, in a lying down position was new to me.

Viewing from above on a plane I saw the clouds beneath me as wonderful giant icebergs or an enchanted city or country as in the tales of Thousand And One Night.

I saw, felt the beauty of spring when the Mahogany artistically was sprouting new leaves, as delicate as a Chinese painting of plum blossoms in winter, yet without being in Europe in spring. And I thought of flower arranging. But this was by Nature’s hand. I remember the exquisite beauty of the blimbing with hundreds of red tiny flowers perching on her stem and branches. And a branch with blossoms of the Lamtoro tree, so fine, so “fragile” with hovering little bees on its woolen-like small round flowers was as seeing a paradise in the air. Not to say of seeing a paradise in a flowering coconut tree from close by, or a paradise in the showers of blossoms of the King-palm tree or the showers of red-, white-, black-colored berries of the Buni tree.

And just before my feet there was a paradise in the water, formed by a rivulet. Wide, clear and very shallow, so that each grain of sand could be seen, little water palms here and there and the grass half under water and a bit fresh green of algae and an only little fish, the Kepala Timah, Cupang, Beunteur, and there was a blue damselfly perching still on a grass leaf rising from the water or hovering still in the air. And the water further flowing imperceptible, silently, endlessly into a streamlet again to new paradises. How live that water was as compared to water from our taps, fountains or swimming pools.

Then, I saw another paradise in the distance. How green the paddy as a giant carpet, the tall trees surrounding it. How fine to walk, how cool is Nature’s park. And I thought of Adam and Eve wandering beneath the trees, enjoying the streamlets, the fruits, hearing the same birds, feeling the same cool air, wind, seeing the same sun, stars, moon, clouds as happy, delighted, enraptured as I am now.

I’m so grateful as I could see, find a paradise just before my eyes, my feet without searching for a Paradise to the end of the world. I could find a paradise anywhere.

July 18, 2008

Miss Vain

Miss Vain

Pak Arif watched a little girl in a restaurant who enjoyed looking closely at her self in the mirror, tossed her hair backwards, turned her head this way, that way for a long time. “What a ‘Miss Vain’.” But then he whispered to me. “I myself am just as vain as she is as I exert a lot, perhaps even more to heighten my inner appearance no one could ever know. Ha, ha, ha.”

July 2008

A Cricket's Philosophy 9

The Big 8 Pledge

What’s the G 8 pledge to cut green house gas emissions in half by 2050 when they’re already dead?.


What A Joy

When we were children, we began the day with picking “kenari” fruits. There’s an aged woman, who begins the day with picking sweet smelling “Melati” flowers.


Want To Hurt, Gladden Someone?

When you ever want to hurt or gladden someone do it when they’re still alive. When they’re dead it’s too late.

The Conductor's Thoughts

The Choir Conductor’s Thoughts
Oh, what a lot, what a riches, I, we’ve gained! At least a better, stronger voice.

I’ve not just enjoyed music by hearing it perfect on CD or live in a concert hall, but performed it myself together with my choir and but an electronic organ, not an orchestra, yet enjoyed it even more though imperfect. Analyzing the musical score revealing the harmony, its beauty and enjoy it.

As when I think of us who are now about 60 – 80 years of age, starting to exercise and sing eight years before with almost no formal musical education and singing lessons.

Just think of such beautiful songs of “God So Loved The World” of Stainer, “The Divine Redeemer” of Gounod, or “Wie Der Hirsch Schreit Nach Frischem Wasser” of Mendelsohn. We even took the courage to sing though but some numbers of the “St. John’s Passion” of Bach, “Die Jahreszeiten” of Haydn. “Die Zauberflote” of Mozart. It took us months to master just one of it but we willingly, patiently exercised which gave us hours of joy, excitement and happiness. How we loved the songs, as I remember some 150 pieces, each one beautiful, unforgettable. How I, we, even enjoyed the charming “50 Lecons De Chant” of Concone. Am I ever so grateful to the composers. So he said to me.

Remember, this is Indonesian English.

A Cricket's Philosophy 8

A Cricket’s Philosophy 8

Plus & Minus

Solomon had a lot of pluses that favored him. He was a king, handsome, young, rich, intelligent, wise. He certainly would be loved, liked especially by women because of his pluses. But suppose he became poor, sick, a prisoner, perhaps he would be left alone as what was liked, loved of him were his pluses.

A vagrant, has a lot of minuses. He is poor, dirty, not handsome, has no proper education, has his home and sleeps under a bridge. Who would have him as a friend, like or marry him? But if there was one who still would like or love him then he certainly must have some thing very good, special, at least recognize him as a human being, not observed, seen by others. And I think of Subandrio who had so many minuses as he was prisoner with a death sentence, shunned by the community and old, yet was chosen among all men by a loving woman to be her husband. That would be an invaluable credit to them as they were loved, liked despite so many minuses.

Suppose there was a painting with a plus of being extraordinary costly. Than there’s no credit to the painting as the owner treasures it because it was of a high money value. When it’s value drops, he might throw it away. And so is a flower, a fruit, a job, a sport, a hobby, … with many pluses. When the pluses fall so will their eagerness for it, also fall, drop, flop, then leave it, stop, throw or go away.

That’s the drawback, disadvantage, weakness behind a lot of pluses as it was pursued because of the pluses, on the other hand, there’s the advantage, strength behind many minuses since it was pursued, achieved despite the minuses. A man with a big minus of being blind could still “see”, read and write.

Remember, this is a cricket’s way of thinking, feeling. I wish you could also feel, what, how a cricket feels, thinks, but I doubt it. Well, anyway, one day you’ll certainly find it yourself.

Opa Johan's Nicest Ache

Opa Johan’s Nicest Ache

“Oh, oh, how it hurts” said Opa Johan’s wife.

“Do you think that only your rheumatism is hurting? Tooth-ache is not less hurting. Only you haven’t ever experienced it.” said her husband. “Well, choose an ache that’s nicest if there was one, stomach-ache, head-ache? Is there an ache which is not hurting, torturing?”

“Those women who practice their morning health exercises look so very healthy. They probably are seldom ill. “It’s true that good health is invaluable, money can’t buy as people say.” so said his wife.

“Oh, don’t be mistaken. Anyhow, it doesn’t assure, secure one to be invulnerable to illnesses, sickness, decease. Sure, they are healthy, but they have other ailments which we don’t see, hear. They don’t walk limping as you do, their feet are not swollen, their body temperature not high, their voice not hoarse, don’t cough or lying ill in bed.

“But their ailments could be an empty purse, heart-ache, jealousy, cheated, tricked, pursued by debts, which are not less pain-, hurtful Suppose then, at that time - don’t be angry, this is only ‘if’’ – if I run away with … ,” he whispered, “wouldn’t you be very, very hurt for days, weeks, you hardly could sleep, eat? What’s the pain of your rheumatism? Almost nothing.” he comforted.

“The nicest ache, - just guess - is ‘love-ache’, you little fool. Ha, ha, ha.” as he kissed her.

August 2000

Phone Call: Mr. So And So Passed Away

Phone Call: Mr. So And So Passed Away

Suppose there was no good, kind person to deliver us such a phone call, we wouldn’t have this headache of torturing ourselves to visit and say our condolences, wearing a sad, sorrowful face, sit, looking as though lost for a very long time. When one wants to be good, visit him or her when he/she was still alive and healthy, not when he/she has passed away.

How could I ever feel sorry, when I almost never saw him. It was different when Foxy died. I, we, our family mourned silently. We missed her as she was so very near, so dear to us. Every day I embraced her and she slept with me, even more than a human being. Why couldn’t we, the whole world silently sorrow as when Princess Diana died without having to visit her?

Suppose one of our loved ones passes away, I wont have an ad about it or trouble my self to inform my people as they never could feel, imagine such a loss. No consoling, comforting words, sermon whatever could efface this. Moreover, I certainly couldn’t stand seeing people acting, feigning to be very sad.

For a loved one there’s no compulsion. We come willingly without having to say “We’re so Sorry”. No one needs to know it. So comments si upik when she got a phone call telling her, some uncle passed away.



Foxy was buried in our garden. So she’s still near us. Si upik silently wept, cleaned the earth of fallen leaves, planted some plants and laid some flowers on her grave.

May 2000

A Good Man Covers His Goodness

A Good Man Covers His Goodness

It would be better when the demonstrators don’t plant paddy on the high-road in front of the United Nations head office in Jakarta, to be covered by the press, TV, and seen, by the United Nations and the whole world. Instead, not to plant just once but many times by going down the villages, rice fields, giving aid, information, … to farmers. That would be welcomed like a blessing, though not seen or praised by the people or the world.

Sure, a good man on the contrary covers his goodness, his merits, his concern, knowledge, accomplishments, his aid, donation, to his neighbor, as he would be ashamed of himself lest he should do this for show. He follows his own heart’s dictates, conscience, instead of blindly obeying ethical teachings. As a firefly, he carries his own light, religion in his heart.

So comments someone when he saw demonstrators plant paddy in Jl. Husni Thamrin in the news papers.

From Suara Karya,, January 21, 1999